You know how we do things that when exposed would be our undoing…a relationship is one of the few things in life that exposes your area of weaknesses and other character defects. From lies to keeping up appearances, the things we do for the sake of love are appalling.
Today, I have compiled a list of 5 dangerous habits about to make your relationship go south. If you want to remain happy like me, do consider going on a 21 day “change this bad habit” retreat.
5 Habits Killing Your Relationship
Some of you don’t even know the difference between gossip and talking about your challenges in the relationship. Let me show you an example,
Gossip: I think my partner is too extravagant, he likes women and doesn’t listen to me.
Not Gossip: We have a problem and I was wondering if you can offer some alternative way out of it. We have a communication problem, haven’t talked about our finances and trust issues too.
Notice how gossip always seeks to put the other person down? The next time you want to complain about your relationship to someone, ask yourself why you want to talk about the challenges you are facing, if such persons are mature enough to keep their mouth shut and lastly gauge the sensitivity of the matter.
Some issues are better left untouched except you are talking to whom it may concern. Remember your secret is safest with you.
From lies to insincerity, to dillydallying around the truth to half-truths, all these will eventually wreck you. One lie is all it takes to birth ten thousand more lies. Truth is you don’t need to lie to gain their acceptance; whoever loves you will love you hook, line and sinker.
If you are tempted to change the script before you show them the movie, then don’t even invite them to the cinema in the first place. A lie is like an ostrich hiding it’s head in the sand hoping that the other parts of its body will be covered too. Learn to tell the truth no matter how bitter it is. Most times, they know the answer; they are just giving you a chance to prove yourself.
3.Insecurities/ Low Self Esteem
If you are on the small size and your partner loves plus size women, there are two things you can do to make the relationship work: add some more flesh or wave him goodbye. Any other option will leave you miserable whenever a plus size woman walks by because as far as your subconscious mind is concerned, that is the ultimate living, walking, talking representation of your partner’s ideal woman is in the territory.
No matter how good of an actress you are, you will feel bitter and anxious on the inside. Repeat after me, “SPECS ARE IMPORTANT!” Same goes for the men, if she likes them tall, fair and broad-chested and you’re short, dark and handsome, it is either true love or true wealth keeping her. Find out for yourself which one is holding her back. Hard truth but you had better swallow it.
Fun fact: I don’t like men who…never mind.
Are you a spend thrift? I recommend the book “Confessions of a shoppherholic” to you. You need to really review where the money is going. Relationships are capital intensive and nothing irritates a partner like constant requests to purchase stupid items that end up in the wardrobe or on instagram.
If you are dating a sensible person, you wouldn’t have to even pressure them into buying you stuff. The lover is a natural giver. If they are not giving you, they either do not have the means to do so at the moment, are stingy or are giving it to someone else.
Relationship is warfare…and the best way to fight it is to go on your knees. From side chicks to side demons, you have a duty to keep them safe and successful by praying for them. A big secret to dealing with unfaithfulness is to pray for each other to be faithful.
There are seven billion others on this planet and believe me not all of them are happy you are happy. Keep them at bay by quenching their fiery darts of rumor mongering, flirting and gossip. I give you a secret, if anyone is doing the masquerade dance around your beloved, pray about it, talk about it and together work your away around it.
Never force your way into believing it will go away with time. Time does not change anything, decisions do. Whatever you hide will always grow. Ask the little seed you just planted in the garden.
Jealousy is a characteristic of anyone truly in love, if you are dating them and they do not show at least the slightest hint of possessiveness, they really won’t care whether you threaten to break up with them or not. Be their greatest fan…don’t wait for the world to cheer them before you join the roar, start when your voice can still be heard.
I didn’t say launch a CIA interrogation for every time they are not around you or police the love out of them. If you love them, make them feel loved. You know how these things are done. Don’t use other people to make them jealous, be so good they want to put you on a billboard with a “That’s my girlfriend” splashed across your face.
Did I help you today? Sharing is caring; help someone help their relationship today. Until I come your way again, faya on!